"I hate distance. You meet the best people and they are always far away."
— R.K.  (via 366quotes)

stand-up-comic-gifs:

Baron Vaughn (x)

(Source: khalkorra)

damonssalvatoree:

thesmellofgreen:

laughterkey:

milesofastora:

vinyasanya:

its never not a good time for this video

…..you…..you found it

Classic

can you believe there are people who haven’t seen this video before

……..oh…….. oh god……god

What the fuck did I just watch?

(Source: nicklugo)

randomisjen:

bonniegrrl:

mostlysignssomeportents:

image

Exterminator John Birkett found the bed in a house in Winchester, England, in a spare room that had not been entered for several months. The crocheted blanket was saved.

Read more…

ACK!!!!!!!!

OH HELL TO THE NO!

Forget the blanket, I would’ve burned the house down!

I need it!  I need it NOW!

(Source: eviljovan)

desi-girl-problems:

He called on parents to take responsibility for their sons’ actions, saying parents must teach their sons the difference between right and wrong. 
"When we hear about these rapes our heads hang in shame," Mr Modi said. 
"Young girls are always asked so many questions by their parents, like ‘where are you going?’. But do parents dare to ask their sons where they are going?" he asked. 
“Those who commit rape are also someone’s sons. It’s the responsibility of the parents to stop them before they take the wrong path,” he added.
___
Okay, say what you want about him, but this is a big deal. This is Prime Minister Modi’s first Independence Day address since being elected. And instead of using this time to talk about Pakistan, like every other Independence Day speech in the past, he stood up there and talked about INDIA’s need for improvement. And amongst his topics, he talked about rape.
And he didn’t describe it as “accidental” or “boys making mistakes”, and he didn’t state that women need to “dress more dignified”, all of which have been said by other Indian politicians. For once, we’re hearing someone put the blame on the rapist, and actually calling out parents to raise their sons properly. Like everyone else, I’m still hoping Modi isn’t another PM who is all talk.

desi-girl-problems:

He called on parents to take responsibility for their sons’ actions, saying parents must teach their sons the difference between right and wrong.

"When we hear about these rapes our heads hang in shame," Mr Modi said.

"Young girls are always asked so many questions by their parents, like ‘where are you going?’. But do parents dare to ask their sons where they are going?" he asked.

Those who commit rape are also someone’s sons. It’s the responsibility of the parents to stop them before they take the wrong path,” he added.

___

Okay, say what you want about him, but this is a big deal. This is Prime Minister Modi’s first Independence Day address since being elected. And instead of using this time to talk about Pakistan, like every other Independence Day speech in the past, he stood up there and talked about INDIA’s need for improvement. And amongst his topics, he talked about rape.

And he didn’t describe it as “accidental” or “boys making mistakes”, and he didn’t state that women need to “dress more dignified”, all of which have been said by other Indian politicians. For once, we’re hearing someone put the blame on the rapist, and actually calling out parents to raise their sons properly. Like everyone else, I’m still hoping Modi isn’t another PM who is all talk.

blackopalpeacock:

hotmesswithouthehot:

lemonmintcoughdrops:

the-grudge-girl:

I live in Osaka, Japan and often use the subway to go to work in the morning. One day while I was waiting for the train, I noticed a homeless man standing in the corner of the subway station muttering to himself as people passed by. He was holding out a cup and seemed to be begging for spare change.

An overweight woman passed by the homeless man and I distinctly heard him say, “Pig.”

Wow, this man is insulting people and he still expects them to give him money?

Then a tall businessman went by and the man muttered, “Human.”

Human? I can’t argue with that. Obviously, he was human.

The next day, I arrived early at the subway station and had some time to kill, so I decided to stand close to the homeless man and listen to his strange mutterings.  A thin, haggard-looking man passed in front of him and I heard the homeless guy mutter, “Cow.” Cow? The man was much too skinny to be a cow. To me, he resembled a turkey or a chicken. A minute or so later, an obese man went by and the homeless man said, “Potato.” Potato? I was under the impression that he called all fat people “Pig”.

That day at work, I couldn’t stop thinking about the homeless man and his puzzling behavior. I kept trying to find some logic or pattern in what he as muttering. Perhaps he has some kind of psychic ability. In Japan many people believe in reincarnation, so maybe he knows what these people were during a previous life. I observed the man many times and began to think my theory was right. I often heard him calling people things like “Rabbit”, “Onion”, “Sheep”, or “Tomato”.

One day, curiosity got the better of me and I decided to ask him what was going on. As I walked up to him, he looked at me and said, “Bread.” I tossed some money into his cup and asked him if he had some kind of psychic ability. The man smiled and said, “Yes, indeed. It is an ability I obtained many years ago, but it’s not what you might expect. I can’t tell the future or read minds or anything like that.”

“Then what is your ability?” I asked eagerly.

“The ability is merely to know the last thing somebody ate,” he said.

I laughed because I realized he was right. He said, “Bread.” The last thing I had eaten for breakfast that day was toast. I walked away shaking my head. Of all the psychic abilities someone could have, that one must be the most useless.

HUMAN

HUMAN